Have You Ever Felt Ashamed?

I hope that when you read my blog posts you NEVER think I think I am perfect because I am so far from it you need binoculars to even see me.  I pray everyday for a positive attitude when the tiny things in life sneak in and want to ruin my day ... oh, wait it's not tiny things it's the devil.

In answer to today's blog post title ... YES, I have felt ashamed and just this morning as a matter of fact.  Follow me now with my chain of events.  Last night I was backing my Highlander in the garage (NOTE:  I do that because there's not enough room on the side for me to pull in forward) anyway ... back to my story ... I was backing my Highlander in the garage and my daughter gets home and out of habit hits her garage door opener.  Do you know the sound that is made when the big oversized garage door hits the luggage rack on top of your car?  I slammed on my brakes thinking I had hit the brick wall on the other side of the garage.  Needless to say I knew the garage door hit my car but my daughter swore that it didn't.  I got the step ladder out this morning and yes, it did.  Thankfully though it hit the luggage rack and not the back window.  Moving on ... The next event was missing 3 1/2 hours of sleep during the night ... this was not a party-hardy type of missing sleep ... it was a beyond my control loss of sleep.  When I got back to sleep about 3:00am, someone text me at 6:00am this morning with the message ... Call again.  HELLO! You obviously were on the wrong person to text this to because I was ASLEEP and did not call you.  Dutifully I got up and called and guess what?  NO answer because I'm sure the right person ... called AGAIN.  Now let me explain about me losing sleep ... loss of sleep doesn't necessarily make me grumpy ... loss of sleep for me has a tendency to give me a migraine and vertigo which I had both going on this morning.  Being tired isn't a big deal ... aren't we all just a little tired every now and again?   Anyway, this morning you would not have seen the 'happy' side of me ... not that I was too terribly grumpy ... just hard to find that smile.

I go to the Saturday 4:00pm church service at Gateway Church so my Sunday mornings are my planning time for meals for the week and grocery buying.  I have to tell you that I did NOT want to do this task this morning, however, I knew I would greatly regret it if I didn't.


So I sat staring at my paper at the kitchen table and thought ... dinner, dinner, dinner ... what sounds good this week.  When you're grumpy, nothing sounds good, let me tell you.  <smiling>  Oh one other little caveat I forgot to mention ... I didn't have any Coffee Mate for my coffee this morning and I had to use milk which I detest in my coffee.  Dinner .... dinner ... dinner ... I started going back through previous weekly menus and came up with enough for the week.

 I didn't need any meat except turkey sausage for the Calzones for Wednesday night and that was a good thing as I was thinking I would save money.  Well I spent $20 more today than last week when I had to buy meat.  Go figure ... <smile>

As I was shopping, my conscience got going about the post I had put on FB this morning about lacking sleep and asking God to be with me this day and to please keep His hand over my mouth ... I stopped right there on the cereal aisle, got my phone out and deleted that post.  I'm so glad I did.  Read on and you will find out why.

After walking all the way to the other side of the store to get the one item on my list which I had forgotten (ugggghhhh)  I headed to the check out.  Early morning shopping is great, no customers but it also means that Kroger didn't have their full compliment of checkers either.  So I get in line 8 which looked as long as line 10 (there were only 2 checkers), however, a Kroger lady told me to move to line 10 as it was shorter.  The last time I looked it was the same but now it was shorter. (Thank you Kroger lady)   I listened to the checker who told the lady in front of me she had saved I think the guy said $30 on her purchases and I thought what the heck ... how did she do that?  I didn't ask nor did I ask her where she got the cute shoes she had on that looked so comfortable.  That lady gets finished and leaves and now it's my turn ... I move up to the counter where Matt is checking and Donald is bagging.  This is where my shame came in.  I'm grumpy because my sleep was interrupted and cut short, and I look and Donald, my sacker, he has NO  hands.  Do you know how ashamed I felt for being such a grump?  Probably not but let me tell you ... I was ashamed of myself.  I watched him bag my groceries without hands and how he stacked my 10 containers of yogurt up and put them in the bag ... two by two ... and of course, I got to talking to him.  He was a young guy ... probably under 20 years old... and here he was happy as a lark and he wasn't grumpy and if you ask me, he had a reason to be.

Now if you have been reading my blog since it's beginning and you have ever thought I make some of the things I write about up ... I don't.  I'm not saying <laughing> that I am beyond making up stuff <laughing> but I do not make these things up.  This stuff happens to me.  I got to thinking as I walked to my car how much of a message/blessing I would have missed from God if that Kroger lady hadn't come along and told me to move to line 10 ... which was indeed shorter than line 8.  I would like to challenge you today ... If you are feeling grumpy and put out with your situation or someone, think about Donald, the sacker, at Kroger who has no hands.  Maybe that will put things in perspective for you  ... it did me.

I wanted to share a little tip that I got from my friend, Greta, about a year ago.  If you've read my blog for a year, you might remember after I got out of surgery for my 'breast reduction' (mastectomy) I wanted Dr. Pepper.  I could not get enough Dr. Pepper and a side note ... I was not necessarily a Dr. Pepper drinker.  Anyway, when Greta brought food over after I got home, she also brought me some Dr. Pepper ... now sometimes I have to tell you that I am not the brightest bulb in the box ... but I never thought about this.  You know how you get those drinks with that plastic stuff around each can/bottle and you fight to stretch that stuff out in order to get your drink out ... well Greta shared that she cuts that plastic with scissors instead of fighting to get the drinks out.  DUHHHH Gena ... the light bulb came on.  HELLO!  <laughing)

Above:  If you are trying to figure out what's
on that place mat (and I'm sure you are... right) there are two
of them ... a chicken picture with another place mat
on top of it that has Tinker Bell on it.  The plastic
placemats are good for the toddlers that eat a Grammy's house. 

These are not Dr. Peppers ... they are Cokes.  *** Thanks Patti, you know what I'm talking about.  <smile>  Since the Dr. Pepper phase, I've been through a Sprite phase and now I'm going through a Coke phase.  These are the 7 oz cans too because ... well just because I don't like to see things wasted and I don't like to waste ... so I figure we can drink 7 oz of something.  And they are not diet ... I do not drink diet drinks since my diagnosis.  I mean what's a little sugar, right?  <smile>

Last Friday I went to a luncheon at The Center where I dined with several women who have either gone through or going through breast cancer.  Every time I attend one of these luncheons, my life is blessed.  This luncheon is called ... Simply the Breast ...

Do you see the smiles on our faces ... we hug on each other, we share our stories and we eat.
Phillipians 4:13 ... I can do all this through Christ who strengthens me.  

I hope you didn't wake up grumpy like me but if you did, remember, there is always someone out there who has it much worse.  Open your eyes to see ... God will show you just like He did me this morning at the Kroger in North Richland Hills.  Thank you Father for eyes to see Your many blessings that You bestow on me.

Blessed and thankful to be here ...  after all what's a little scratch (ok, maybe it's a little bigger than a little scratch) or some lost sleep.  Praying blessings for you too.

genam44@charter.net