The Day My Journey Began ….
One year ago today, my breast cancer journey began. Remember the saying … You can’t see the forest for the trees? Well that’s where I was on September 15, 2011, the day I got my diagnosis that I had bilateral breast cancer. My world turned dark for a while that day. There was an ache that racked my soul. It was like someone was telling a horror story and I was the main character but I had not even auditioned. The tears flowed from the bowels of my inner being. I wanted to scream but there no words coming out of my mouth. Yet all the while, I felt someone holding me and whispering … It’s going to be OK. I am here with you and I will never leave you. That someone was our awesome God and He was holding me while He spoke His words ever so gently to me as He caressed my soul. Isaiah 41:10 So do not fear, for I am with you; Do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you, I will uphold you with my righteous hand. With family gathered around me and the initial shock of the diagnosis was starting to sink in … I said … Today I cry and tomorrow I fight … and that’s what I have done since that dark day of September 15, 2011.
The
days and weeks ahead were hard … first of all, one of the hardest facts was
that I knew I had cancer growing in my body and I wanted it out. It was difficult … when you have cancer all
you want is to get it out of your body. But first there are many things that have to
happen. I was blessed with a sister who
is a nurse and knew all the best doctors that I would need. She accompanied me to all the doctor
appointments because it is very true when they tell a cancer patient … Be sure
and take someone with you to your appointments because you will listen but you
will not hear. Surgery for my bilateral
mastectomy was set for the morning of October
18, 2011. That was a glorious day for me
… it meant the cancer would be gone.
October 18, 2011, came around and at
the door to the surgery room before I was whisk away by my sweet driver (gurney driver that is) ... my family stood lined up and one by one hugged and kissed me and told me they loved me. My heart ached as I knew how bad they were
hurting and how much they didn’t want me to be going through this. They held me tight and they cried. They left me bravely at that door that day,
no one but God knew what the outcome would be.
They waited patiently (OK, well maybe not patiently because it took
about two hours longer than the surgeon originally told them). As it turns out, my surgery took about five
hours. Now being under (put to sleep)
that long, has a tendency to make one look pretty bad. My girls didn’t care, they wanted a picture
with me with them when I came out, so here’s a never before shown picture of me
with NO makeup and out of surgery. I’m
glad they had that oxygen on me, I looked pretty bad.
After
recuperating from surgery, it was decided that I would begin my six rounds of
chemo. Thankfully I was able to get through
Thanksgiving before chemo began. I
cooked and enjoyed my family for the occasion.
Monday, November 28, 2011 rolled around and my friend, Alverna, came to
pick me up and away we headed for the next leg of this breast cancer
journey.
We
got to The Center and my blood work proved I was good to go … take the chemo …
and so we headed upstairs to the chemo room at The Center to begin this venture. I found me a chair and Alverna got the chair next
to me and I was plugged up … one drug at a time until all three bags of the drugs could
drip into my body during the next 3 ½ to 4 hours.
And
so it began … the six rounds of chemo. I
continue to this day to Praise God that I didn’t get throw-up sick while taking
the chemo. I had my issues and still
have a few today but at least I didn’t throw up. You see if you look hard enough … there will always be something that
you can be thankful for … you just have to look for it.
Sometime
after the second round of chemo, my hair began to fall out and I mourned. It’s like I said … No matter how you cut the hair pie, a woman will mourn the loss of her hair and so it was … I mourned. My first hair cut (thank you sweet sister-in-law)
was a spikey number. The cut was OK with
me … I still had hair.
On March 12,
2012, I took my last round of chemo and celebrated with the nurses at The
Center who had taken such good care of me.
They came bearing gifts for me that day and they listened as I so
genuinely thanked them for all they had done for me throughout chemo and a real
plus that day was that I got a foot massage. Thank you Sandra.
On April 12, 2011, I began my 33 rounds of
radiation. I was blessed with wonderful
radiation techs who talked to me, answered my endless questions and celebrated
with me the day I completed my 33rd round which was May 29, 2011. I met Mr. Bolo, the silicon pad that was used
every other day and the last five rounds I had a more concentrated dose as they
used the contraption below. And my skin burned some under my arm ... go figure ... that happens to be a part of your body that doesn't even see much sunshine. All in all, it wasn't bad, it healed very quickly. I still have a bit of a tan line on my chest as a reminder of the radiation.
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| Above: See the cross just behind me? God was always with me ... displaying Himself as the alignment box with the cross on it. |
I have since had follow-up doctor visits with all of
my doctors and will continue this for the next five years. I feel healthy and good and am so thankful
God provided me with the best medical team a girl could have. This journey which began in the horror movie
has provided me so much more than it has taken from me. I have met so many wonderful people that I
never would have met had it not been for the diagnosis. I have had the opportunity to share and
hopefully educate others on this dreadful disease. I have grown just like the sick looking
little mimosa trees I went to Arlington to buy in early spring. See how the tree has flourished … and so have I.
My walk with God has strengthened many times over
and my faith has deepened. I see things
differently … I see things the way God wants us to see them. I lean on Him all the time and during those difficult
days during this past year and even now when I was or am not able to make it on my own, He picks me up and carries me. I am blessed
beyond measure.
Something I tell new chemo patients and always told myself ... Always remember …. It’s just hair.
Thank you dear family, friends, co-workers, and all those reading my blog who I do not know for following me during this past year as I began my breast cancer journey. I am humbled and so blessed. I pray that I
made some type of impact of educating others … even if only one person … on
this dreadful disease. It is not a death
sentence … we can beat this. God has
shown His light on my life and I pray that you allow Him to shine it on
yours.
2
Samuel 22:29 You, Lord, are my lamp; the
Lord turns my darkness into Light.
Blessed and praying blessings for you today.
genam44@charter.net
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